It’s “that time of the month” again.

The week that every adolescent woman resents; the week filled with agonizing cramps and constant uneasiness — all to be endured in quiet pain. Menstruation is a natural phenomenon where the lining of the uterus is discharged through the vagina. Despite approximately 50 percent of the world’s population being affected, periods come with a great stigma.

 

Junior Alex Yang understands that a period is a normal bodily process, but he can’t help but feel uncomfortable talking about it with others.

 

“I’m not actually sure why it’s so weird. It’s embarrassing. It’s one of those things that shouldn’t be weird because [all females go] through it,” Yang said. “But I don’t bring it up as much in conversation because first off, it’s rude and misogynistic if you assume someone’s on their period because they’re acting weird. That’s not okay to do. [But also] girls aren’t as comfortable talking about it so I don’t [either]. If I do it’s just weird for them sometimes.”

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Science teacher Kyle Jones felt a similar uncomfortableness regarding periods when he was younger. His family never seriously discussed it with him, and he says his school didn’t teach him anything important enough for him to remember. As a result, he tried to ignore the subject altogether, perceiving it as taboo and impertinent to his life.

 

“It … took my first real relationship with another person to actually have a conversation about the ins and outs of it and come to a point where I could appreciate what [it] meant to them, how it made them feel, what they were going through,” Jones said. “Being somebody who understood that to a point where I could be supportive and understanding of it.”

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Although she is female, biology teacher Lora Lerner couldn’t openly talk about periods until she got hers. In fact, instead of learning about it and how to deal with it from school or parents, she gained most of her knowledge from Judy Blume’s fiction books.

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“It didn't feel like I could openly talk about it, not because anybody ever made me feel bad, but just nobody did,” Lerner said. “So if nobody did, clearly, you just weren't supposed to. That was the clear message that was given even though I don't remember anybody shaming me about it or anything.”

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According to Lerner, the stigma surrounding periods can sometimes be converted into the form of an unthoughtful joke or tease. She believes that the people who make comments like, “she’s just moody because she’s on [her] period,” or “are you on your period? You’re in a bad mood,” don’t fully understand how offensive these words are.

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“I've had people say that to me,” Lerner said. “And the only way to guarantee that somebody gets more mad at you is to tell them that they're in a bad mood … There's something about somebody telling you why you feel the way you do is so offensive. It's like, ‘let me have my own feelings. Don't tell me why I'm supposed to feel that way, or that I'm in a bad mood, maybe ask me why I'm in a bad mood.’”

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Although sophomore Roya Ahmadi hasn’t experienced these comments herself, her friends have received a handful, which has brought the subject into her attention.

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“I don't think it's the right thing to say because first of all, if they are on their period — and maybe [they are in a bad mood] actually because they're on their period — but you don't need to mention that,” Ahmadi said. “Especially if they didn't bring it up, it's not super fair for a guy to be like, ‘Hey, is that what's happening?’”

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Consequently, Yang tries to avoid making any comments relating periods and a girl’s mood. He sees how rude it can be, even if one says it without bad intentions.

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“I think that [girls] could be going through something entirely different,” Yang said. “Even if periods are a big reason for mood swings, saying ‘are you on your period?’… invalidates their feelings because you’re … automatically excusing [their] behavior as just a mood swing.”

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Although Jones knows that nobody should be subject to the above mentioned remarks, he’s heard the statement made so often that he rarely reacts anymore.

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“The way it’s used is often just as a blanket statement for anytime a woman is moody or not going along with what the person feels like they should be,” Jones said. “I think there’s a point where sometimes it’s used in such a disconnected way from the actual thing that it becomes a colloquialism that is so removed from the original … that it’s not even related to the actual thing.”

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Like Jones, Ahmadi doesn’t respond in an extreme way, but with a different forethought. She doesn’t want to immediately jump on anyone for saying such things, and thinks their ignorance should be addressed by making people aware of the impact of their words.

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“I think ‘offensive’ is a … strong word,” Ahmadi said. “I feel like if someone said that to me, I would be taken aback, as in, ‘why don't you … think that my emotions are genuine and that I'm actually saying this to you?,’ rather than blaming it on whether or not I'm on my period.”

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Lerner believes that it can be offensive when anybody — regardless of whether or not they go through a period — asks the question, but she believes that each person has a different intention when asking.

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“We all know you can't say certain racial terms outside of a group,” Lerner said. “That may be fair or not fair, but that's reality. We do take it differently when it's somebody that's in our group versus outside of our group. I think there's a built-in extra offensiveness when boys say it because [they] don't even understand what it's like to have a period … Whereas when a girl says it, at least they know where you're coming from. Even then, it's presumptuous.”

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Contrary to Lerner’s views, Jones would consider it more disrespectful if a woman said the derogatory phrase to another woman.

“You’re still using it and you know exactly what it means,” Jones said. “At least you can say, ‘Well, the guy’s just stupid. He doesn’t even know what it is. He’s just being dumb.’ But for the girls there’s a layer of understanding … which is more malicious.”

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Nevertheless, both Lerner and Jones agree that people should avoid saying this phrase because it can be demeaning and shows blatant disregard for a woman’s actual feelings. Lerner actively tries to inform people that those comments are offensive, and hopes that others can also react with a more composed manner.

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“I've tried to make that a teachable moment, but I'm not perfect either and sometimes I just get more mad,” Lerner said. “Sometimes I'm in a bad mood. [However,] it also doesn't mean that you're never moody because of your period. Sometimes you are. But it certainly doesn't help for somebody to assume that.”